How to Write a Eulogy?
When organizing a funeral or celebration of life, allowing a window of time for the reading of a eulogy is key. The funeral speech is one of the most significant elements of the ceremony.
You’ll most likely want a few tips to help you get started if you’ve been entrusted with the important task of writing the eulogy.
What is a eulogy?
A eulogy is a commemorative speech that is delivered during a funeral ceremony or celebration of life. It serves as a last goodbye to a deceased loved one and is meant to honour the life they lived. The eulogy also allows relatives to express what the deceased meant to them and how this person has touched their lives.
Who Delivers the Eulogy?
Normally, a funeral speech is given by the deceased’s immediate family or someone they were close to.
Being asked to write and deliver a eulogy is very telling. It is a sign that the family trusts you to honour their loved one’s memory.
No one will hold it against you, though, if you’re too choked up to deliver your speech on the day of the funeral. Everyone in the room is well aware that this is a very emotional task. Another relative or the funeral officiant can help read the text you’ve prepared. I
If you’re a distant relative or friend who wishes to speak at a funeral, make sure you ask the deceased’s immediate family a few days before the event. It’s important that you respect their wishes during this difficult period. They might also want to read your speech before giving you the OK.
5 Elements to Include in Your Funeral Speech
You might feel a little overwhelmed if you’ve been entrusted with this task, especially if you’re grieving.
The first thing you need to know is that a eulogy usually lasts between 5 and 10 minutes when read aloud and is usually composed of 750 to 1000 words.
Next, here are 5 elements that usually feature in a funeral speech.
Introduce Yourself
Remember that not everyone in the room will know who you are. The first part of your tribute is quite simple: start by introducing yourself and letting the audience know what your relationship to the deceased was.
Talk About the Deceased’s Life
This second part is a little like a biography. Talk about the deceased’s personal life:
- Did they have a big family?
- Was their biggest pride their children?
- • What was their job?
- What made them happy in life?
- Did they have any passions?
- Did they have grandchildren?
You can mention a few accomplishments that make you particularly proud of this person.
Mention character traits that everyone will remember them by. What made this person lovably?
Come Up With Anecdotes
Make your speech more personal and dynamic by mentioning a few anecdotes that reflect the character traits you mention. You can talk about what this person has taught you and what they have brought to your life.
You can even incorporate a bit of humour as long as you do so affectionately and tastefully.
Share Your Feelings
This is a good opportunity to discuss loss and to tell the audience about this person’s passing. Be honest; don’t be afraid to share how difficult it is to lose someone you love dearly.
A Comforting Conclusion
End with a comforting conclusion like an inspiring quote, a song your loved one particularly enjoyed, or a poem or prayer according to your beliefs.
A Eulogy: The Writing Process
Now that you know what your funeral speech should contain, you must write it. Sometimes, the hardest part in writing is getting started.
Here are a few suggestions on how to go about it.
Write Down Your Ideas
Start by simply getting your ideas down on paper. You don’t even have to use complete sentences. You can list words that remind you of your loved one.
You can also jot down expressions that this person used to often use or even quotes or poems that you find inspiring.
The goal here is not to have a perfect first draft; you’re simply looking to get rid of that blank page and get writing.
When transforming those words into sentences, remember to make them short and simple so that they’re easy to read, even if you get choked up.
Ask Loved Ones to Help
Even if this is your speech, you’re not the only one grieving. You can ask your relatives to help.
In fact, this can serve as a good excuse to gather with your family in private. Take advantage of this moment to remember your loved one. Go through family photos and videos, and share anecdotes. Not only will this inspire you, but it can also help you through your grieving process.
Practice Before the Funeral
Once you’re done with the writing process, practise your speech in front of your family. What do they think of it?
Remember to breathe and speak slowly.
On the day of the funeral, we suggest you print your whole text so that someone can finish reading it if you’re unable to.
A Funeral That Lives up to the Memory of Your Loved One
You’re also in charge of organizing the funeral ceremony? Please know that we have a partnership with a life celebrant service that can help you set up a celebration that lives up to your loved one’s memory.
The 4-Celebrations team can direct you to the right resources during this difficult time. Our consultation service is at your disposal.